Okay, I’ll try to answer more questions tomorrow, in between PT and crocheting practice. Right now, I really need to be in bed. Like, an hour ago.
Autistic Hedgehog
RSSi hope its ok if i ask you for advice bc im on the end of my rope rn. so i found out recently i actually have a history of autism on both sides of my family and in doing research i realised i fit most of the criteria & ive been looking to get an actual diagnosis bc it would make my school life SO much easier but when i went to my gp first she googled aspergers for reference then referred me to a psychiatrist who refused to even discuss the subject and just? where can i go from here? im so lost
Anonymous
The first thing to do is try asking your GP for a new referral. Explain that the psychiatrist she referred you to refused to even talk to you about it. It may take some time to get the referral, but she ought to be willing and able to do it. There’s a big difference between someone saying you don’t have autism and someone refusing to even discuss it, so in this case, you didn’t actually remotely get what you went to the psychiatrist for.
It might help to do some research and see if you can find any autism specialists in your area that your GP can refer you to. Whatever else, and I know this is hard, but try to be firm and clear with your GP so that she understands exactly what the problem is. If you need to, write down what you want to say beforehand, just in case your brain does the Autism Nope on you. I’ve walked out of a lot of doctors’ offices without saying what I wanted to because of that.
Start there, and see what happens.
Seeing a lot of posts about this today, so I thought I'd put my experience out there. My psychiatrist specializes in ASD, and basically told me that I'm autistic (he said something noncommittal like "An autistic woman with your background might look like you"), but because I can just barely function in society, he won't diagnose me with it because he thinks I'll use it as some kind of crutch. I'm already applying for disability due to anxiety issues, I don't see how it could make anything worse.
if people are having difficulty finding good therapists, I'm in southwest michigan and my therapist specializes in asd and is actually on the spectrum herself. so, if anyone wants her contact info, let me know.
Recently I've come to suspect that I might be somewhere on the autism spectrum, as it explains the things I do that previously were brushed off as bad habits or eccentricities that ought to be changed but couldn't be and helps me figure out how to handle daily life. The only things is, instead of melting down I completely switch off and enter a state of unresponsiveness and disconnect in an attempt to recover. Does this mean I'm looking at the wrong diagnosis? I have no one else to ask. Sorry.
Anonymous
Not necessarily. We talk about meltdowns more frequently here, but shutdowns happen too, and are basically what you’ve described. A lot of us have some at least occasionally, and there are those of us more prone to shutdowns than meltdowns.
It’s really down to how each individual autistic copes with sensory input, and definitely doesn’t rule out an autism diagnosis.
I'm extremely disgusted by the majority of articles written about mothers who murdered or attempted to murder their autistic children. I'm even more disgusted by the comments left on the articles that defend murder and child abuse by saying "If you aren't a mother of an autistic child, then you can't judge this woman". Uh, yes I can, because murdering a child under any circumstances is wrong! If those cases involved allistic kids, these people's tones would change quick.
Anonymous
Word.
Hey there. My name is Nicky and I just wanted some advice when dealing with someone with autism. My father and my brother have autism or at least traits. It's starting to get hard to deal with because they both gang up on me, laugh at me and make fun of me and they don't seem to understand when to stop. I keep telling them to stop, talking to them, explaining it to them but they don't seem to get it. I could really use some help. Thank you
Anonymous
Hi Nicky,
I always find these ones a bit sticky, because it’s hard to tell if these is an autism problem, a male privilege problem, or a little bit of both. Even when we sometimes miss cues and don’t understand why something hurt someone, most of us can understand once it’s explained. That they won’t stop makes me suspect it runs deeper than just the autism.
Regardless of what’s causing it, it’s not okay. It’s hard to know what exactly might work without knowing them for myself, but do you ever just get angry with them? Yell at them or stop talking to them altogether? If the autism is playing a part in this at all, then one thing you’ll find with a lot of us is that actions speak louder than words. Let them see how upset you are. Has anyone ever told you that you shouldn’t be firm or even angry with them simply because they’re autistic? Because that’s wrong. We can do bad things too, and autism is not a get out of jerk free card.
Again, it’s hard to give advice in situations like these because I don’t have a little information, and I’m sorry I can’t help more. But whatever else you do, don’t let them push you around because they have autism.
How did that dinner date with Thor go? :)
Anonymous
Sadly, he’s been very busy, protecting the Nine Realms and moping over his human girlfriend, and hasn’t been able to keep our date. Honestly, I’m thinking of spending some time with that brother of his. Can you believe the poor guy has been locked in prison for months? I’m disappointed in Thor. I expected more of him.
I saw another ask about therapists being ignorant, and thought I'd share my story. I went to my therapist with inquiries about looking into ASD for me, and she said "But you talk?" I couldn't believe it. "You have a boyfriend, though?" was another gem she threw my way, alongside other incredibly ableist things. It seems that if you're not specialized in ASD, most therapists are completely clueless.
Yes, it does indeed seem that way. What saddens me the most is how few specialists in ASD there are for adults. Autism is not new, not in the least. Not only that, but almost 20 years ago when I was diagnosed, they were already finding a lot of autistic adults who’d fallen through the cracks because they passed well enough. None of this is new information and it should be something there are competent therapists and psychiatrists for. That there isn’t distresses me deeply.
My therapist said she didn't think I'm autistic despite matching up with most of the traits because I'm "capable of emotional relationships". I just needed to tell someone this.
Anonymous
I’ve gotten a bunch of these in my inbox tonight. I am so, so sorry that so many people go through this crap. I mean, I experienced something similar when I made an attempt to move to an adult psychiatrist when I turned 18 (and ended up with my pediatric psychiatrist right up until I left for Sweden five years ago) but I really hoped that was an isolate incident. Running AH has taught me it isn’t, and that kills me.
About Autistic Hedgehog
Feeling prickly today? Feel more like giving someone a smackdown than having a meltdown? Fellow autistics, you are not alone.