Autistic Hedgehog

We all have those days. Every last one of us, even those of us who are otherwise secure and comfortable with who we are.

It’s hard not to, when society constantly tells us that everything about us is wrong. Consider: Anyone could have broken that bin. Absolutely anyone. It’s the sort of thing that could happen to any person, on any day of the week, anywhere else on the planet. But being autistic, a lot of time people blow our mistakes way out of proportion—and that includes ourselves. We’re so used to our behaviors being pathologized, our oddities being treated as if they’re odder than everyone else’s, our mistakes somehow being bigger and more damaging to other people than the ones made by allistics, that it becomes so difficult not to blame our autism—and think there’s something wrong with us—when these things happen. 

But it’s not true. People treat us that way out of prejudice, intolerance, hatred and ignorance. They are the ones who’re wrong.  You’re not worth less than other people because you made the same kind of mistake anyone else could. You’re not a burden because sometimes you’re clumsy or mess up. It might sound a bit typical, but it really is true that no one is perfect; everyone has weaknesses, has things they’re not good at. Do we go around talking about how people need to be cured because they can’t play basketball or do long division or sing well or jump rope or any of a number of other things? Nope. We don’t. 

So why should you need to be cured? You don’t. Society has just trained you to doubt yourself because it views you as different. Because it has a set of “norms” that you don’t meet, a set that is completely arbitrary and narrow-minded, and society is an inflexible bastard that would rather bully you into changing yourself than work to adapt to your needs. Well, society can go fuck itself. You have every right to be you, just like anyone else does, and who you are is not lesser. 

These feelings aren’t truth. They’re not coming from you, they’re not some form of acceptance of what’s “right.” They’ve been forced on you by judgmental asshats, and yeah, there will probably always be days when they’re hard to fight. There will always be moments of doubt. But that’s what we’re here for, me and other people like me. To remind you that the problem isn’t you, and to help you up when you’re down. 

Because the problem really. Isn’t. You.