Autistic Hedgehog

[Anyone who tries to rewire my brain

Is going to die a very bloody death]

I’m sure most of you have seen this by now. Seriously, scientists, doctors, all y'all medical peeps: Back the fuck off. 

Here’s the thing, right. There are definitely aspects of my autism that I wouldn’t mind alleviating somewhat. Certainly there are aspects that I hope, with some work and real research, we can learn to alleviate for all autistics. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s frustrated by the sheer amount of things I can’t eat because OMIGOD NOES texture get it away from me!

But with everything I’ve seen lately, I don’t trust people. I don’t trust them to understand what parts of me are valuable. I don’t trust them to understand that even the more problematic aspects of autism wouldn’t bother me half as much if other people were more tolerant and flexible. I certainly don’t trust them with the task of rewiring brains, especially on people who aren’t yet old enough to understand and appreciate their brains. 

There are so many aspects of my autistic brain that I love and value, despite the hardships it’s brought me. I don't want to see the world the way allistics do. I mean, no offense guys, seriously, but in spite of all the problems, it’s more interesting in here. I like it, my terror of social spaces and public transportation notwithstanding. And I simply don’t trust The Powers That Be to understand and respect that. I don’t trust them to allow me the autonomy to make my own decisions, to accept that I can make my own decisions.

Until I can trust them, they need to stay far, far away from me with their metaphorical ice picks. (Sorry for the ramble, I just have so many feels about this.)